Week VIII

I can not believe that the summer program is already over. It has gone so fast. I am so proud of all the first years on their presentations and their first time presenting their research in front of an audience. It can be a lot of pressure and I think they handled it well. I am glad that I went first just to get it over with!  I think everyone could use a little bit more practice before Heartland.

I also just want to say that for many of us this is the first of many lasts for us this upcoming year. Our last McNair summer program, our last week with Michelle, the last GRE prep class. (Thank goodness!) I am so grateful to be a part of something so wonderful and helpful to further be education. Without the McNair program I would not be afforded the amazing opportunities that I have had.

This week was spent preparing for the luncheon. I finished any readings that I had to do and put together my PowerPoint. I had email correspondences with Dr. Smith to make sure that my slides were perfect. Alex and I also spent time practicing out speeches so we did not stumble through them on Friday. All in all, I think they went well.

Reading: 15 hours. Email: 2 hours. Preparation: 4 hours

Week VII

I cannot believe this is already my final post. This summer program has gone by so quickly. I feel that I am ready for the presentation on Friday, but jeez, I can't believe that it came so fast.

This past week I met with Dr. Smith for quite possibly the best meeting that we have had all summer. He gave me the most encouraging words. He told me that I could give my presentation right now without a hitch and that I just needed to pull everything I needed to know together into a cohesive manner for Friday. It made me much more confident. Alex and I got together to work today and I think that also helped to have the support of each other to know that it's not overwhelming, and just to take a deep breath and get it together.

I hope that all of us take what we have learned this summer and apply it to many aspects of our academic careers. We have all been given unique opportunities to be a part of something much greater than most of you realize. There have been many times over the course of being a McNair Scholar that I have had friends that wish they could be in my shoes, but do not meet the requirements. I find this funny given what it means to be a McNair Scholar. I take my position in the program very seriously and the staff work even harder for us to have the opportunities that we have. I hope all of us can give them the proper thank you at the end of this week and especially to Michelle. For all that you have done for me in the past year, you will be missed, more than you will ever realize.

Hours: reading: 17 hours. writing: 4 hours. email: 1 hours.

Week VI

Oh what a productive week I have had!! I finally met with Dr. Smith and we discussed so many aspects of the research. He got me back on track and got me motivated again about what I was doing. I had forgot what my real focus was for the past couple of weeks. In talking to Dr. Smith, I am so excited to be reading the material again. I spent a lot of time this week pouring over Def Jam Poetry youtube videos looking for artists who expressed spacial ideas related to race. I really want to incorporate different forms of media into my research so that it is not just a linear view of the ideas.

Elderidge Cleaver and I have a love/hate relationship. I am so over reading this book, yet I am so engrossed that I can not put it down. for such a short book, you would think I would be done by now. However, I just have moments that I just have to put it down and move on to something else because it makes me so angry or because he is absolutely crazy. I'm still reading essays out of The House That Race Built. I have also revisited The Racist Culture. It is such a deep and heavy book that it is so hard for me to get through. It reminds me of The Souls of Black Folks in regards to how long it takes me to get through a small amount of pages. I want to make sure that I thoroughly understand every word to the best of my ability and the concepts and ideas of Goldberg and DuBois sometimes are hard for me to grasp.

At this point, I think my research is moving along just fine and that I am in a good position going into the last two weeks of the program. I have fallen a little bit behind due to the ICA project, but have no reservations that my project will be complete.

reading: 18 hours, youtube: 6  hours, meeting: 2 hours, email: 1 hour

Week V

This week has been madness. I am trying to stay caught up on my reading for Dr. Smith and get the rough draft out for Dr. Arnold. (While I know it has nothing to do with McNair, It's eating away at my brain matter. And this perhaps is my only outlet for people who understand.) I have yet to get in contact with Dr. Smith and that has also been a point of contention. So I continued reading Souls On Ice and reading out of The House That Race Built. I am having such a hard time staying on track. I have to get this project done with Dr. Arnold before I rip my eyeballs out. I just want to be able to focus all of my attention on MY project. This summer is proving to be much more challenging than last. While I am in no way complaining about such an amazing opportunity to be a part of this project, it is so much more involved and complex than originally anticipated. It's harder than we (the other research asst.) thought to write (the process evaluation.) Hopefully I will get in contact with Dr. Smith soon and get this paper done even sooner!! Good Luck everyone! hours this week reading 18 hours, email 1 hour.

Week IV

This week has been very productive as I finally got the last book that I requested from the bookstore, The House That Race Built. It has a number of essays written by prominent authors in the field of African American studies. I have found that many of the essays have a special interest in my research. I am amazed by what I am reading and by what people write. I also sometimes finding that I have to read things so many times that it is counterproductive and have to just move on to something else.
I have been going back through some articles that I heavily focused on last semester. Appiah, Lopez, and Higginbotham to review and look at some of what Cleaver is talking about and what I am thinking about. I still have not met with my mentor and I what nothing more than to discuss this book with him. Souls on Ice is sinking into my brain and disturbing me. I think in a good way, but I'm not really sure. Sometimes I throw the book across the room. Yet I am so enamored by it I can not go more than twenty-four hours without reading it.
I spent mist of my week reading, reading, reading, reading...18 hours. I did some reviewing this week of past articles, 3 hours. email tag with my prof....1 hour.

Week III

I have been completely engrossed in Elderidge Cleaver. He was a fascinating man. Albeit a man who had some issues, but the book Soul on Ice makes me feel strangely uncomfortable. It fits so well into what I do, how I'm not sure yet. I have spent this week reading, reading, reading. I feel like that is all I am doing is reading. I read my books to the D & B (I hope some of it they remember, and some of it they don't!) I am a little concerned because I have not had much contact with my mentor which is really unusual. I have made multiple attempts through different networks and have received no response. I hope that he is well.

This week I have continued to plug through Soul On Ice 15 hours. I am carefully reading it as it has a lot of very deep meanings and language I am unfamiliar with. It is much more, emotionally than I had bargained for and am having a hard time getting through it.

Week II

This week has been much more productive than the previous week. My books came into the bookstore! I am starting my summer reading with David Theo Goldberg's "Racist Culture," Eldridge Cleaver's "Soul on Ice," and Ralph Ellison's "Invisible Man." Nothing like some "light" reading over your summer research going! I am meeting with Dr. Smith regularly and as usual we always have very productive use of our time.

This topic is very different from my topic last summer. I am so much more engaged in the topic of race and what it means and what it does. When we were discussing inclusion and diversity last Friday with Patrice, I found it interesting that every group brought up race when race was not mentioned initially at all. That is why I was very quiet. Not my typical modus operandi at all. LOL.

On a different research note: I am gearing up to finish my project with Dr. Gretchen Arnold. She informed me yesterday that we will be co-authors on the project given that we help write our portion. How exciting!! She will be submitting the final paper to the Department to Education for publication and I will be a co-author. That. Is. Insane. (I'm glad it is almost over.)

I spent this week reading the beginning of the Soul On Ice and rereading parts of Soul of Black Folks (my personal favorite). 15 hours.
I also had a meeting with Dr. Smith discussing Appiah's ideas of what race is and how it is incorporated into my research. He is my favorite thinker when it comes to my topic. 2 hours.